My name is Katie and I am in my early 20's. This blog is focused on Jesus and my journey with Him. I will also be blogging about recipes... really what ever the Lord puts on my heart to share. It will be like a pot luck blog... if that makes any sense!
Anyways, the Lord and I have gone through so much together and He never leaves my side. I want to share what the Lord has been teaching me and hope that this blog can be a place where we can all encourage each other in our walks with the Lord.
I wanted to share with you my journey with the Lord over the past year or so... Its kind of long I do have to warn you... But here we go!
Last year, in 2011, we walked through a frightful "cancer scare." He was so present even before the cancer diagnosis. In early January of 2011, I was at college when "life" seemed too hard to handle. I would cry over little problems. Like this one... my roommate and I came back from Christmas break with mold creeping up our walls in our dorm room and I had a melt down. I panicked, trying to fix the problem. We had to sleep in our neighbors room for a few days so the mold could get taken care of. We had like 6 of us girls in one small dorm room... It was actually kind of fun and I shouldn't have gotten so panicked about it. Silly, I know. It actually freaked me out that I was overreacting so bad. And keep in mind, that was just one small thing! Anyways I decided to come home for the weekend to get into the doctors and just be at home for a few days. I actually ended up not going back to college because the doctors had found a lot of things that were wrong with me. After maybe 3 months of going from this doctor to that, I got diagnosed with PCOS and low thyroid. We focused on the low thyroid part for a few months. Then in May my whole health focus switched to this cancerous tumor that was on my adrenal gland.
The fact that the tumor was even found is a miracle from God! Jesus is so good to us :) So they found the cancerous tumor and told me it was very rare, serious, and needs to be removed immediately. I will never forget the overwhelming feeling of fear eating me up when I heard the news. BUT, I will also never forget the peace that the Lord lavished over me within the hour. He kept me under His wing from this time all the way through to my recovery. I seriously felt like I was in a bubble with just Jesus and I. He graciously kept my focus on Him. And when it did stray on the situation, He brought me right back to Him. While the Lord kept me at peace, my parents were on the look out for the best surgeon out there... the one we first went to said he had never heard of this cancer and was not willing to preform such a complicated surgery. Again, the Lord came in and found us a good surgeon up at Stanford. We meet with him the next week after my diagnoses and wanted to get the surgery done that week we were there to visit him. He was unable to do it that week and we settled for May 23, 2011. Well good thing because we came home to a call from my brother that he was on the way to the hospital. He had gotten in a motorcycle accident and had to get an emergency surgery on his ankle. (I phrased that wrong but you get what I'm saying!) Don't worry, this was all part of Gods plan.
My brothers accident allowed us to focus on him rather than my cancer and surgery. We actually had a lot of fun. I would push by brother around on his wheel chair around the block. Here is a picture!
It was good family bonding time. His accident also allowed him to be there for my surgery. Which was a huge blessing to have all that support with me. My parents, siblings, mom's parents, and one of my cousins drove up to Stanford to be there for the surgery. We all drove up together, and made it fun!
The day of the surgery arrived...
It was scheduled to be a long surgery. Well it was a lot shorter than they planned! They were able to get ALL OF THE TUMOR OUT (along with my adrenal gland as the tumor grew into it) in less than the time they had planned for! Thank you Jesus!!!
Recovery was bitter sweet. Recovery included a lot of nausea and pain.
I was so happy when I could sit up on the edge of my bed. When I could finally walk, I remember thanking the Lord and asking Him for strength to help me walk and not faint or throw up. Never in my life would I have thought I would have such difficulty with walking. But the Lord gave me strength to make it! The Lord and I listened to Kari Jobe, a worship singer, 24/7 and He kept me in constant communication with Him. I have to tell you my favorite song from Kari Jobe is called "Healer."
My nurses were my mission field for that week and we had so many good conversations! I remember this one nurse who was younger than all the others. She and her husband were remodeling their bathroom. So we had a lot of fun talking about that. The Lord blessed me with so many loving nurses! My other two day nurses even threw me a dance party when I was able to walk and had more strength... they were so much fun!! Anyways the one nurse I was talking about was on the night shift and would always come in to check on me. We would talk forever and I was able to talk about Jesus with her. There were points where I was too weak to write so I had asked her to right down a Bible verse that the Lord had given me. We talked a lot about Jesus and this verse. It was Jeremiah 33:6 which says, "Behold, I will bring it health and healing; I will heal them and reveal to them the abundance of peace and truth." I knew the Lord was going to heal me.
Well a few days later, guess what?! The surgeon said they biopsied it and it was not cancerous!!! It was actually not what they were convinced it was... PRAISE THE LORD! I believe with out a doubt that that was all the Lords doing. The doctors did not make a mistake in their first diagnosis but that the Lord had CHANGED it. Jesus also gave me a chance to talk to another patient and lead her into the sinners prayer. She got saved!!! I guess she had been watching me. She noticed me when I took my daily walks around the nursing station and knew there was something different about me that she wanted to have as well. The Holy Spirit! My Jesus! His peace! This was her husband telling my dad and I all of this in the "computer area" when I was updating my other blog to keep friends and family up to date. Well while he was talking to us, his wife started getting sick and throwing up. My mom ran to get the nurse while my dad and I were praying for her. My mom was praying and talking to her when she was starting to feel sick. When everything settled down and she was feeling better, I came to visit her in her room. We talked and she wanted to know more about Jesus. We scheduled to meet the next day. I was not prepared for her whole family to be there to listen about Jesus too... cousins, sisters, other relatives (most of them women)! It was such a blessing to be a part of what the Lord was doing that day. They were at the edge of their seats hungry for the words that Jesus wanted to share with them. The wife wanted to accept Christ and she did at the very moment. My mom and I lead her in the sinners prayer. I forgot to tell you that the day we met her, I was waiting to hear if I could finally leave the hospital. I got the ok then the doctor changed his mind. I was unable to because my pain was still bad. I was upset. Then the Lord told me that I need to not be so upset because He was not done... He still had something for me to do... which was to tell this woman about Jesus! The Lords timing is perfect!! Unfortunately I am not sure where or how she is doing today but know she is in the Lord's hands.
Its been a year and the Lord is always so faithful. The tumor has not grown back. :)
I am still working with doctors about my PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and low thyroid. It was put off for some time and I didn't even realize the importance of getting PCOS (has to do with a hormonal imbalance and insulin resistance) under control until the end of August 2012. The Lord brought this to my attention. I was all set for my last semester at the community college when the Lord redirected my focus. I was almost to the end of my first class when I got really bad pain in my ovaries... Long story short a cyst had burst leaving me in bed and a lot of pain for the next 3 days. In a panic I dropped all my classes. Through this, the Lord got me turning to Him for questions and I felt Him saying I need to get my health figured out and get serious about it. So I am not going to school this semester. Rather I am focusing on the Lord and my health. I switched to a naturopath doctor and am working with her to get my health back by using natural things like herbs, diet, exercise. I don't believe medication is the answer for me and refuse to take things like birth control. I know that the Lord can heal me and that if I eat healthy, exercise and take natural supplement, the PCOS can be reversed. I have done a lot of research and believe this is where the Lord is directing me. The Lord has revealed to me the importance of getting this figured out and His timing is perfect. I would have been way too overwhelmed if I knew what I know now about PCOS while going through my cancer adventure and surgery. It is all in His perfect timing! PCOS can cause diabetes, ovarian cancer, and infertility if it is not taken seriously.
Even though there have been a lot of disappointments with my health, I am glad that I have them. I know that the Lord will work all things out for good. Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to HIS purpose." If we are His children, we are called!
These trials make me aware of how much I do need Jesus. It gives me a lot of time to be with Him, to soak in His grace. Even times to question Him. Our relationship has grown so much. And yes, there are times when I am so angry at the Lord because I don't understand why I have to go through all of this BUT He always calms me down and helps me to trust in Him. Don't be scared to be honest with the Lord. He already knows your thoughts and wants you to communicate them to Him so it can be worked out. He is our life line. I love Deuteronomy 30:20. It says "that you may love the Lord your God, that you may obey His voice, and that you may cling to Him, for He is your life and length of your days..." The theme of this year between the Lord and I has been to abide (to dwell or live) in Him... John 15. He is also teaching me so much more... like when we keep our eyes on the Lord, we cannot be moved.
If you want to know more details of my cancer journey you can check out my older blog, which I wrote while it was all happening. Here is the link: http://freeblogspot.org/tinkatie/
If you got through all of that... congratulations!!! :) I know it was long but I also know that the Lord has given me a story of hope and His mighty power is so clearly seen. He has given us all a story to share.
God bless,
Katie
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